“It was there that I had an encounter with the living God.”

Craig Macartney
Spur Ottawa Writer

Raised in a Christian home, Josh Beattie was thriving. He had a good job as an electrician, a wife of 10 years, and two young kids; but his life was not what it seemed.

“I lived a double life,” Beattie states. “I had the public image, that included being active in church, but privately I was a wreck. I was rotting from the inside out.”

Though he does not know when it began, Beattie lived with a constant fear of rejection. That led him to try to earn the respect and love of those around him, as well as God’s; but he could not keep up the image.

“I began to fall into addiction, with porn and then alcohol. It made me feel accepted.”

Although he tried to deal with his issues, he never addressed the feelings of rejection and always ended up in the same trap. After four years, Beattie’s wife was fed up.

“God affirmed things about my identity that I was seeking from porn and booze.”

“It was Christmas 2018 when she told me to get my stuff together or she wanted me out of the house. The very first thing that crossed my mind was, ‘Yes! Now I get to drink the way I want, I get to consume the way I want.’ Looking back, that’s not a normal thought. After a couple days, I realized I needed to do something different.”

Beattie decided to take three months off work to get help and attend Alcoholics Anonymous. Yet, he was wracked with anxiety and depression about the stress of returning to work, fear of a relapse, and the need to provide for his family. After sharing his fears with his doctor, she put him on medical leave.

“I had the opportunity to attend Restoration Week, up at Ellel Ministries. It was there that I had an encounter with the living God. He affirmed things about my identity that I was seeking from porn and booze.”

Beattie was still afraid about the effects of returning to work, so his pastor, Jon Ruby, asked if he wanted to work for Carlington Booch—a social enterprise Kombucha business run by Union City Church. Carlington Booch aims to raise awareness about addiction and help those in the early phases of recovery by providing work experience and a supportive environment. Yet, to go from making $45 per hour to $14, at first Beattie thought it was crazy.

“I’ve seen Josh go from isolating when things got tough, to willingly opening up and confessing his need for God.” Photo courtesy of Josh Beattie.

“But there was something inside me that said, ‘I have no other option, my life has become like so unmanageable that I need to do this,’ and I did, in October, 2019. It’s been great to see the healing God has brought to my life and my family.”

“I’ve been grateful to watch Josh surrender his own idea of what life should look like,” says Ruby. “He has gone from striving to earn position and support his family of his own will and strength, to trusting God to provide for all his needs. I’ve seen Josh go from isolating when things got tough, to willingly opening up and confessing his need for God. Instead of escaping into his old ways of coping, he is present with his wife and children.”

Working at Carlington Booch has given Beattie the chance to see God provide in amazing ways and, through that, to recognize God’s radical love for him. The job also gives him flexibility to attend 12-step meetings, spend more time with his family, help others, and have a supportive environment to grow.

“Josh is a different man than he was one year ago, even 6 months ago.” Photo courtesy of Josh Beattie.

“Josh is a different man than he was one year ago, even 6 months ago,” explains his wife, Johanne. “I am so proud of the way he’s given his life over to the care of God. It is definitely a one-day-at-a-time thing, but to see his confidence grow, his ability to connect intimately with me, his devotion and faith in God, his trust in God’s provision for us, and to see a man set free, is allowing our family to be much more in the moment.”

The journey has revitalized Beattie’s faith and helped him have a relational view of God, for the first time in his life.

“There is a night and day difference and I can only give that to God. Addiction almost ended my marriage. Addiction affected my ability to work. Addiction made my life unmanageable. My life was headed towards death. I’m grateful, because on December 30th, 2018, I got a second chance at life.”