“I love the fact that Friends for Dinner has given me the platform to find such a good friend.”

Craig Macartney
Spur Ottawa Writer

Spur Ottawa has often highlighted Friends for Dinner—an outreach that offers international students a chance to meet friends and experience a home-cooked Canadian holiday meal. This fall, Spur Ottawa interviewed an international student to share his experience and perspective of Friends for Dinner. The student asked for anonymity to protect his privacy.

Spur Ottawa (SO): How many times have you participated in Friends for Dinner?

International student (IS): Including this Thanksgiving, four times now, with three different host families.

SO: How did you hear about it and what made you decide to participate?

IS: I first heard about it from my [Middle Eastern] friends. I was curious to know more about Canadian culture.

As a Muslim, I had this goal to get in touch with other Abrahamic-religion followers. I was curious to know how things are done, what other Abrahamic religions are like, and their perspective regarding life and God. I love to understand their way of life. I don’t want to narrow myself down to my own community. I want to see how others seek the truth and how they practice the truth they have found, to widen the horizon of truth for me.

SO: What were you expecting when you first went to Friends for Dinner?

IS: For newcomers to Canada, it is some kind of rabbit hole, because you don’t know anything about the customs. I didn’t know if we were going to shake hands. Should I take off my shoes or leave them on. The holiday aside, everything is new, even basic things. Back in my home country, we eat dinner around 8 or 9 and, if we have someone in our home, we stay and chat until around 10 or 12. I had not had a lot of interactions with Canadians my first time, so I did not even know when [Canadians] usually eat dinner.

SO: How did your experiences differ between the three host families?

IS: I would say one of the families were zealous Christians. They gather to say some kind of thanks for the food, this is common with all three families. After dinner, the family who I call zealous Christians read from Psalms and say prayers. The other families do not practice these things, so that’s why I think [this family] is more devoted. That’s my guess.

SO: What stands out most about your interactions with these families?

IS: I didn’t expect such hospitality. Back in my home country, people are very hospitable, but I didn’t know if Canada is the same. The amount of warmth and hospitality I received was very high. The whole experience was very fascinating for me.

SO: What was most fascinating?

IS: With one family, they tried not to lose contact, even after the occasion finished. I wondered why they were determined to maintain the connection, that was very nice to me. This also happened with another Christian friend of mine—a friend I did not meet through Friends for Dinner.

The one family I have been in contact every week or every other week. We maintain a very close connection. The other families, I have their email, so occasionally we contact each other or I sometimes talk to them when I go running and passed their house. But with one of the three families, we are actually friends, real friends. I love the fact that Friends for Dinner has given me the platform to find such a good friend.

SO: What would you say to other newcomers, about Friends for Dinner?

IS: So, I’m a bit doubtful in spreading the word about Friends for Dinner. I am not sure what the policy is, generally, but somehow Christianity is being preached. I just want to make friends, so I am [hesitant] to suggest it to someone else, because I don’t want to give a platform for preaching.

SO: How has your experience with Friends for Dinner shaped your experience with Canadians?

IS: I can’t generalize from three families, but I am more confident in talking with Canadians. Other religions, I am not confident to approach them—I am not sure what kind of reaction I would receive—but Christians I know are very approachable. One thing I can sense is the element of kindness. They talk to you as if you are a member of their own community, but you are not and they welcome you like that. It is very nice. I have a feeling that, being a Muslim, you could find very good friends from the Christian community and stay a Muslim.

SO: Is there anything else you would like to share?

IS: I have found wonderful friends in Friends for Dinner, wonderful Christian friends.