Craig Macartney
Spur Ottawa Writer

A few days ago, I came across an article highlighting China’s “most romantic Valentines gestures.” The list included a bouquet of 999 roses a boy could hardly carry, over $8000 in cash (each bill folded into a heart), and a bouquet of vegetables with 90 peas that a 103-year-old man gave his wife in honour of their 90 years of marriage.

Valentine’s Day is a time-honoured celebration with a reputation for flashy or expensive gifts. While few people would turn their nose up at $8000, every gift’s shine eventually fades. That’s the nature of relationships, they’re always based in the now.

By now, Valentine’s Day has come and gone, heart-shaped chocolates are on clearance, and the race is on to see which of the 999 flowers lasts the longest.

I’ll always remember some advice a friend gave me the first year I dated my wife. As I shared my epic Valentine’s Day plans (I’ve always been a hopeless romantic) he told me, “Dude, tone it down. There’s no way you’ll be able to top that next year.”

I laughed, but he was serious and he lived by that code. Valentine’s Day is an awesome opportunity to display your love, but the thing is, no relationship can last on one day a year.

That’s why, for the first few years, my wife and I celebrated about 100 anniversaries. There was the day we met, the days each of us realized we were in love, the day we started dating, the list was practically endless. We even celebrated “Valentine’s Day 2”—the day she organized after being so impressed with my Valentine’s plans (which I didn’t tone down).

“Enjoy life with the woman whom you love…for this is your reward in life”

We never gave that up, but eventually there were too many to keep track of. Now we honour the spirit of the anniversaries by planning nearly-constant surprises for each other. It doesn’t have to be big, even just a chocolate bar. The point is that we are thinking of each other. Our lives are pretty busy, with three jobs, three kids and a fourth on the way, but we work hard to be available and spend time together as often as we can. That’s what love is really about—making someone else your priority.

Often it’s the little things that mean the most. My wife says one of her favourite parts of the day is watching for the email I send every morning, asking how she’s doing and telling her “I love you.” It’s one of our simple ways of feeling close and encouraging each other throughout the day. There’s even a verse about that. Amid the discouragement of Ecclesiastes, Solomon says, “Enjoy life with the woman whom you love…for this is your reward in life.” (Ecc 9:9)

One day cannot brighten love, but love can brighten any day. So love freely. Love unashamedly. Love simply. But, most of all, love daily.